Another Mommy First

I don't know if I've told you before, but I've NEVER been a mommy to any of my kids past age 3. 

until now.

Monster is 3 1/2 and this whole school thing is fairly new.  PJ was always with his dad, and I never got to see anything with Em past her first ARD.  Shortly after the first day of her school, I lost her.

So, every new thing with Monster is a THRILL for me...literally.

Before Thanksgiving, I got my very first Handprint Turkey!!!

Egg was so proud of me, she took the pic.    

Yes, every little thing is BIG for me.

So, I have to admit that I'm a dummy when it comes to some of these school things.

Yesterday, Monster came home from school with this

It's mallowy and bouncy to best describe it.

All day, I was trying to figure out what it was.  It molds to different shapes.

So, after trying to figure out what it was all day, I went outside with the bag last night and asked Egg.

QQ was outside with me, and she knew immediately what it was...

HOMEMADE SILLY PUTTY!!!

I've never heard of this, but it's fairly cool.  Though it would have been nice if the teacher had said what it was when they put it in his bag...LOL.  

So, this is another MOMMY FIRST for me!

It's a learning process for both of us!  

COACH on sale for as LOW AS $35.90

I know EVERYONE wants a Coach item one time in their life and right now is the perfect time to get something!!!

Right now RueLaLa has Coach items on sale with items starting as low as $35.90!!!

**I see some giveaways coming up**

Yeah, can you tell what MY signature color is?  

And yes, there are at least two bought already that are giveaways...not giving any more hints!

It came out of nowhere...

I will admit...I'm a perfectionist...almost to a fault.

IT. KILLS. ME. IF. SOMEONE. IS. IRREPARABLY. ANGRY. WITH. ME.

I try anything to fix it, to repair what I've done in anger and I. CAN. DO. A. LOT. in anger.

It's taken me the better part of 35 years to learn to control my anger and I think I've done a good job.  

But, there are times, however few and far between, that I let my temper get the best of me.

One of those times was when I was in the middle of my divorce with Stephen.

I. FELT. BETRAYED. AND. HURT.

Hurt beyond all that I've ever felt. E.V.E.R.

I also try not to feel guilty about my past, but there are those times...those little times that bubble up to the tip of my emotions, and SLAP. ME. BACK. TO. REALITY.

And it's those times that are the worst.  I wonder.  I hope.  I pray.  That someday, someway she will forgive me for what I've done.  I hope for that one phone call that says, "I miss you."

You see, Carol (Stephen's mom) tried to comfort me, quite often.  She would give me a hug, and growing up the way I did, I wondered what she wanted with that hug.  NO ONE has EVER given me any affection without wanting something in return.  So, I was like the little kid that didn't understand what was going on.  I usually walked around the house in amazement as to how someone could ever LOVE and ACCEPT me for who I was, without asking anything in return.  But, Carol did...and I hurt her more than I've ever hurt anyone in the world.  So, what am I trying to say here...I really don't know.  All I know is this needed to be said.  

And another thing.  I MISS CAROL CARTER!       

I hope someday she will forgive me...for now, I have the memories...and I cherish every one!

Do You Know That November is National Adoption Awareness Month?

I have to say, even though I was a little on the wild side and grew up very poor, I did lead a somewhat sheltered life.

In high school, I only knew one person that was adopted.  Just one.  

My husband was adopted, along with his brothers and sisters.  

So, why am I bringing this up now?  Well, because of adoption, I found myself in a funny situation.  Here's a little background:

Because of my farming interests I had a friend named Nelson on twitter.

I knew he lived in South TX, and he knew I lived in East TX.  Then, he said his daughter was going to SFASU in the fall, the same college as my husband.  I was excited and told him if there was anything that he wanted me to do to help her out, I would be there for him.  Well, shortly after school started was her 21st birthday!! He wasn't able to come to East TX to see her, but between the both of use we made up a surprise for her.

The really funny thing...I had never SEEN her or talked to her!  So, on her birthday we were talking on the phone and I asked him about some defining features so I knew who I was looking for.  All I had was her name.  So, when he said "she's got black hair and brown eyes, she's black" I was shocked! Not for the reasons you would think, but because he never told me that she was adopted, and I grew up at Ft. Hood, so there's all sorts of different family types there...nothing is new to me.  

So, now that I knew who I was looking for, I was able to surprise her at her class!

This is the picture that we got that day:

Now, regardless of what you think of me or of bloggers, social media does do good things.  Because of social media two people who had NEVER met managed to get together to surprise a third person!

I learned later that day how she came to be his daughter, and my admiration for him grew 100 times over.  To see pictures of his family, you know that LOVE knows no boundaries and that adoption is a wonderful thing!  

To the Jackson Family...I LOVE all of you, even though I've never met all of you. 

Here is the LINK to the original post about her birthday, 2 years ago!